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The "Adventure Lab" is an idea incubator and collaborative resource hub for women over 40 who are hungry to create epic adventures, even on a shoestring budget. With a focus on asset-building and mentoring, we deal with the whole person in a way that is inclusive, regardless of financial means, and that creates opportunities for women at risk both in our local communities, and in developing nations.

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Letting go of trauma to clear the way for Adventure

May 17, 2016 in , by Sue Braiden

Sue Braiden, Rochelle Zohn, Ethan Zohn and Jenna Morasca

Twelve years ago I was attacked on a subway platform in Boston as more than twenty people stood by and watched.

No one intervened.

When I finally broke free from my attacker, and was running for the stairs, I fell. My hand was broken. I was crying, begging for help, but no one stopped. One by one, people disembarked the train, stepping over me, some on me, without ever looking back. When I finally reached street level, telling subway officials in the toll booths what had happened, they simply pointed me to a bank of 4 pay phones. 3 of them were broken.

No matter what I did, or who I asked, I could not get help.

May 17th has been in my calendar since 2004.

I’m not sure why I felt the need to hang onto it. Maybe to remind myself to be more vigilant (I made some stupid, tourist mistakes). Maybe to remember to be grateful that I’m still alive (especially given the very detailed account of what my attacker told me he was about to do to me). Mostly I think it’s just because I wasn’t ready to let go.

Somehow the trauma became part of what defined me. It’s also been one of my greatest blocks to getting on with the business of Adventures.

Come put your elbows on the kitchen table, and let’s talk about the ways we can stay safer as we’re creating happy experiences and memories …

Trading places. How asking one simple question can give a whole new perspective.

September 2, 2014 in , , by Sue Braiden

Trading places. How asking one simple question can give a whole new perspective.

Needs can be such bothersome things. Sometimes feeding one comes at the expense of another.

We’re creatures of habit. We love dwelling in our comfort zones, even when it’s no longer a smart thing to do.

So how do we find the courage to break out of unhealthy behaviours?

Try asking this one simple question:

If it was my daughter/sister/best friend, what would I tell her to do?

Have you ever been in a bad relationship that you just couldn’t shake? Men, chocolate, alcohol, cigarettes, a toxic friendship … you go ahead and fill in the blank. (Okay, so maybe not chocolate 😉 )

Detaching can be an awesome tool for gaining a little much needed perspective.

When -we- are part of the equation, seeing things clearly can be almost impossible. In our hearts we already know the right thing to do, (our instincts are rarely wrong) but human nature comes bundled with “attachment,” and that can be a tricky thing to sort out.

By stepping back from the situation, effectively removing ourselves from it, it’s easier to jettison emotion right out of the mix.

If we were to watch someone we loved doing the very thing we are doing now, and know to be an unhealthy or self-destructive behaviour, wouldn’t we want to help them make a change?

We need to learn to treat ourselves like a cherished friend. Take five minutes first thing in the morning to sit quietly in a sunny window with a cup of tea, and have a chat with yourself. What do you want to give yourself the courage to do? What do you love about yourself that can help you be strong and resilient in those tough moments? Who do we trust most to share this with, and to be supportive without judgement? (Allies are important when we’re facing really difficult choices, especially on those days when we’re feeling weak and full of doubt).

Do you have a secret weapon?

What kinds of things do you find most helpful when you’re trying to make a really difficult change in your life?

Why not put your elbows on the kitchen table and talk about it? Chances are you’ve got some wisdom that a sister Adventure Diva will really appreciate, while tapping into some great ideas others are sharing too!

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